OTR Athlete of the Week: Brooke Darling

Usually, OTR requires a softball or baseball player to throw two perfect games before we even consider them for our OTR Athlete of the Week award. And Perry thinks they should also at least sniff hitting for the cycle in both of those games. This eliminates any American League pitchers right off the bat.

But this time we decided to make an exception and soften the rules. And so, we congratulate Elk Lake High School Junior Brooke Darling on being this week’s OTR Athlete of the Week. Darling tossed a perfect game last week (or sometime around then, we aren’t much into research and facts around here if you didn’t notice already) in a 10-0 win over those bums from Susquehanna, striking out 20 of 21 batters. We’re serious.

Photo Caption: Acting on bad advice, Brooke mistakenly worked out with magician David Blaine in the offseason. It didn’t help her pitching one bit, but it did allow her to perform neat levitation party tricks like this.

We have a feeling that many of the Runnin’ Woodpeckers (we have no idea what Susquehanna’s real nickname is) will be “runnin’” wind sprints at their next practice. Seriously? One person put the ball in play? Lean into a pitch why don’t you! Do something! Fake an injury! Something! She’s killing you!

We weren’t there, but we think it’d be great if she pulled a Carlos Perez every time she strikes someone out and points at that them as a taunt. It wouldn’t make friends, but it would make us laugh.

Shortly thereafter, Darling and her Elks (we don’t know if that’s the right nickname for them either. But it says Elk Lake and it’s not a far cry to think that they could be the Elk Lake Elks) took on those heathens from Western Wayne. Darling didn’t care about the perfect game this time as she sent some chin music in to the first batter. Yeah, it connected. We don’t know if she did it on purpose or not (99.9% sure it’s the latter), but we think it would be great if she did. After that, she was only able to muster six no-hit innings while striking out 14. Sorry about that, Brooke. Get ‘em next time?

Photo Caption: Carlos will tell you exactly what he thinks of you and your lousy at-bat.

So, congratulations to Brooke Darling, this week’s OTR Athlete of the Week. You don’t get any prize or money or trophy for winning this award, but you get Perry’s respect instead. And in most local bars in Doylestown, PA, that’s worth more than any trophy ever could be.

DISCLAIMER: OTR’s Athlete of the Week is presented semi bi-monthly and cannot be traded in or combined with any other OTR offer or competition. While OTR Athletes of the Week don’t receive physical compensation or awards, they do get a good-for-one-week parking pass that allows them the luxury of using the handicapped parking space at Perry’s uncle’s deli mart in Upper Darby, PA. Once the parking pass has expired, it cannot be re-used and you would officially be taking the space of someone who needed it.